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A man goes up to the minister at his local church and says: "Reverend, I have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during your sermons and I find it very embarrassing, not to mention disrespectful. What should I do?" "Actually,? the minister said, ?I have noticed this and I would like to ask your co-operation this coming Sunday, if you will. When I notice Mrs. Jones asleep, I will nod my head to you, and I want you to give her a good poke with a sharp hatpin in the leg."
In church the following Sunday, as usual, Mrs. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the minister put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said to the congregation, nodding to Mr. Jones. "Jesus" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband jabbed her in the leg with the hatpin. "Yes! You are right Mrs. Jones?, came the minister's quick reply. Soon, Mrs. Jones once again nodded off. Again the minister noticed, and he bellowed out. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning toward Mr. Jones. "My God" howled Mrs. Jones as she was again stuck with the hatpin. "Right again! Mrs. Jones" proclaimed the minister, now with a slight grin on his face.
Before long, Mrs. Jones again nodded off. However, this time the minister did not notice...as he had picked up the tempo of his sermon. He was really going at it, and was also making some hand motions which Mr. Jones mistook as a signal to sharply poke his wife with the hatpin.
At that exact point in the sermon, the minister asked the congregation: "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?" Mrs. Jones screamed out: "You stick that thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!"
"Amen! Amen!" cried out all the women in church.
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