GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 20 a woman is like Africa, half discovered, half wild, naturally beautiful with fertile deltas.

Between 21 and 30 a woman is like America, well developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.

Between 31 and 35 she is like India -- very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40 a woman is like France -- gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50 she is like Yugoslavia -- lost the war, haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.

Between 51 and 60, she is like Russia -- very wide and borders are unpatrolled. The frigid climate keeps people away.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Mongolia, with a glorious and all-conquering past but alas, no future.

After 70, they become Afghanistan. Most everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.

GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN

From 15-on, a man is like Iraq - ruled by a dick.