A Polish man married a Canadian girl after he had been in Canada a year or
so and, although his English was far from perfect, they got on very well.

Until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if hecould arrange a divorce for him, "very quick." The lawyer said that the speed of getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances and asked him the following questions:

LAWYER: Have you any grounds? POLE: JA, JA, an acre and half and a nice
little home with 3 bedrooms.

LAWYER No, I mean what is the foundation of this case? POLE: It is made
of concrete, brick and mortar.

LAWYER: Does either of you have a real grudge? POLE: No, we have a
two-car carport and have never really needed one.

LAWYER: I mean, what are your relations like? POLE: All my relations
are in Poland.

LAWYER: Is there any infidelity in your marriage? POLE: Yes, we have hi
fidelity stereo set &DVD player with 6.1 sound. We don't necessarily
like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes.

LAWYER: No, I mean does your wife beat you up? POLE: NO, I'm always up
before her.

LAWYER: Is your wife a nagger? POLE: No, she white.

LAWYER: WHY do you want this divorce? POLE: She going to kill me.

LAWYER: What makes you think that? POLE: I got proof.

LAWYER: What kind of proof? POLE: She going to poison me. She buy a
bottle at the drug store and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read -- it
says, "Polish Remover."

lol - I guess I better hide my shoe polish :D

/JD

Haha very drole :)